Friday 28th September 1832
Friday 28th September 1832
Musing before getting up and as I dressed of Miss Walker. I think we should be happy together, I should gently lead her into my own ways and soon be really attached to her to the exclusion of all care for anyone else.
From 2 to 3 10/.. asleep in the hut or rather, the last twenty five minutes incurred a cross thinking of Miss Walker. I shall think myself into being in love with her, I am already persuaded I like her quite well enough for comfort – home at 3 1/2 meaning to write letters – talking for 2 or 3 minutes to Marian when a company rap at the door, and Miss Walker shewn into the drawing room her call seemed to be on my aunt – sat about 1/2 hour, and I then walked back with her down the walk – she asked if I had got her note – no! then explained that she had come to ask my advice about her tenant Collins having forced open the barn doors, opening into her court yard – this matter settled we sat down in the hut for about 3/4 hour till 5 50/.. I then walked with her to her own door, and straight back at 7 –
Bordering on love making in the hut, said I should certainly take her off with me, hoped she could trust me, yes. She had the greatest confidence in me and our going together was actually agreed on, and we afterwards talked of it as a thing settled, depending only on our respective aunts, both of whom in a precarious way. Our liaison is now established, it is to be named to nobody but her sister and aunt and my aunt, and that not till a week or ten days before our being off. [Margin: like the day of engagement between Miss W and me] We shall now go on swimmingly and our courtship will progress naturally. She already likes me, perhaps she scarce knows how, and we shall both be in love seriously enough before our journeys. I should breakfast at Lightcliffe tomorrow and could not resist calling as I returned to ask if she had got cold, if she is out I am to go to her at Cliff Hill. My aunt had hoped she would come on Monday to which she readily consented so that we shall probably see a good deal of each other. She looks happy and as of the remainder of the victory to be won, would not cost me too much difficulty.
Thought I as I returned, well Mariana set me at liberty in May, in less than five months I as reprovided and the object of my choice have perhaps three thousand a year, or near it. Probably two thirds at her own disposal no bad pisaller even if I liked her less, a better take than lady Gordon or perhaps than Vere either. Well now I will be steady and constant and make the poor girl as happy as I can so that she shall have no reason to repent –
On my return home found on my desk parcel the letter-press (presse-papier) and note from Miss Walker [Margin: The 1st thing she ever gave me] – explaining about Collins, and that she should hope to find me in my walk between 3 and 5 – begins with ‘I have real pleasure in sending the letter-press, tho my own motive, and its possible utility are its only recommendations to there acceptance’ –
We are in smooth waters now, she tell me more and more of her affairs, she feels at ease and happier
with me than perhaps she could easily explain and probably we shall both be impatient by and by to be off. I myself am surprised? At my so rapid success and at the novelty of my situation, perhaps after all she will make me really happier than any of my former flames. At all rates we shall have money enough, and I don’t fancy she will either be close or stingy or cold to me – Had just written the above of today at 8 3/4 – how litt my aunt thinks what is going on! Mariana believes me safe at home and dreams not how she is losing all chance of me, she is right served –
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